About Me

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Sheffield, England, United Kingdom
Hamba Allah yang berusaha mencari ilmu demi mencapai redhaNya. Seeru a'la barakatillah..

Tuesday, 15 July 2014

Finished Study + Europe trip!

It has been long time since my last time updating this lonely blog... many good things had happened. now, I am in Bristol, UK spending my last summer in UK. I couldn't believe that i am leaving this country. i love this country so much! too many good memories, less brain burden, good life and all. i simply don't want to leave my easy life here. but, i have got no choice since my study has finished. alhmadulillah, all praises be to Allah, i've got my final final result of my degree. it is a first class degree! im graduating in 10 days from now with a title of M.Eng with first class honour. besides that, my final year project has also been awarded with a first class mark which makes me more satisfied! all the efforts and time that i've been spent for my report is worth it now. thanks Allah! During the graduation ceremony, i also will be receiving the poster cash prize since i managed to secure a third place for my final year project poster presentation that day. so many good thingsss that i haven't updated to this site.

Last month, i went to easter Europe for 10 days! it was from 16-25 June 2014. the trip was so fun, managed to see different set of places, people and social life. i feel so lucky to be given opportunity to explore other peoples' country. i never dreaming of travelling a lot before, but Allah has planned for me the best. 

During the trip, me and my friends explore 6 countries:

Bosnia and Herxegovina
Czech Republic

out of all, Bosnia and Croatia are two most beautiful countries. Croatia is beautiful in its own style, Allah granted Croatia with numbers of beautiful sea view. Croatia is so lucky as it is located along the sea. Bosnia is unique in another way. it has no sea, but it has a very beautiful nature! i love the river and waterfall in Bosnia!! it is so so so beautiful, stunning and spectacular!!!

Mostar, Bosnia (sungai yang paling cantikkkkkkk!!! )
Kravice Waterfall, Bosnia
Plitvice Lake National Park, Croatia
Plitvice Lake National Park, Croatia

Dubrovnik, Croatia
me at Zadar, Croatia :D

15 countries that i have visited in 4 years.

inshaAllah, will be back again updating my life story. today is already 17 Ramadhan! how fast time flies.... 3 weeks left for me to stay with my husband in UK. im leaving UK for good on 4th August... i hope I can come back to UK as a PhD student, one day, inshaAllah :D :D

Salam Ramadhan al-Mubarak!

Sunday, 18 May 2014

Botanical Garden: Weekend activity

today is a good day.. as i won the thrid place for the final year project poster presentation, so i decided to treat my bff for lunch since she has been being so supportive and helping me a lot with my study. when i am paranoid, she is the one who makes me feel better. 

after lunch, we went to the Botanical Garden to sit and relax. i really exposed myself do direct sunlight for more than two hours! i like it so muchhhh till audrey said i am obsessed with sun today.haha. what i know is i liked it so much. lying under the bright sun is like a therapy for me, but only in uk. 

will post photos when i free. need to study if not hubby gonna marah me.... 

Friday, 16 May 2014

Prinsip orang sibuk

I learnt a new thing today. at this moment, i know everyone around me including me are super busy with too many study requirements especially exams. being around busy people has shown me many kinds of weird attitude of busy people. to cut it short, lets just number them:

1) the 'can't be bothered' type which affecting others. i don't mind if you wanna be focussing only on things that benefit yourself only, but please "jangan sampai menyusahkan orang lain" you have to make sure that you do whatever you need to do to make everything become fair because others are busy too. okay, this is an advice especially for me, a busy women.

2) the 'always with a serious face' type... seriously if you wanna be serious, please be serious to all entire people that you meet. please dont show your straight face to only certain people and laughing, talking a lot to other group of people. that is so not fair. like me, if i am despo on that day, i will be staying in my room and settle my work and just dont meet people so that my 'mess up' emotion dont affect others.

seriously, please be considerate with others. you are not the only one busy!


just a reflection :D so that i dont do it to others.. ^^

Monday, 28 April 2014

Long distance plus final year tips

Just thinking of sharing something.. 

Hectic life

Life as a final year student of MEng is so so demanding, too many requirements non-stop. it made me lost so many other opportunities due to lousy time management. Lately, my life has been up and down. Life is too challenging that makes me literally tired.

Mungkin hidup aku sedikit berbeza dengan kawan-kawan aku yang lain. aku seorang student dalam masa yang sama aku seorang isteri. berbeza jadi isteri yang serumah dengan suami, dengan isteri yang selalu terpaksa berjauhan dengan suami. 

i am so bad at describing things, but trust me, it is not an easy life. sometimes i do feel like giving up. people out there who think i am getting less organised, please dont be "judgy".... "judgy" is my own word untuk orang yang pandang slack pada aku disebabkan kekurangan aku.. anyway, i know i am not good one like you guys.

Cabaran utama hidup berumahtangga

Ada yang bertanya aku soalan ni.. to be honest, i am so bad at recalling things. cabaran dan kelebihan sama-sama banyak. jadi, susah untuk aku berfikir apakah cabaran utama kehidupan aku. tapi, satu perkara yang boleh aku jadikan jawapan buat masa sekarang ialah, berjauhan, aku rasa ni je jawapan yang aku mampu beri sekarang.

yes, long distance relationship is sometimes easy, sometimes so difficult. well, it depends on how persevere you are in your relationship. from this nearly two years marriage, i have learnt many lessons. it really taught me how to be an adult. it tells me the importance of patience, tolerance, perseverance, and optimistic. without these few components in yourself, you are likely to not enjoying marriage life. trust me. i have faced it.

Tips bagi yang ingin berkahwin

Aku bukan lah banyak ilmu untuk memberi tips. i am learning and i always learnt a lesson. so, antara tips penting untuk kekal bahagia, aman damai sebagai suami isteri:

  •  sabar. kehidupan selepas kahwin sangat memerlukan kesabaran yang tinggi, trust me you will require this skill again and again
  • berlapang dada. benda ni sangat susah nak buat, but trust me, kalo ada benda yang tak suka, better slow talk than attack
  • tolerance. penting sangat, jangan harap pasangan kita sahaja yang nak buat benda yang sama all the time, jangan harap dia sahaja yang perlu paham kita, it should work both ways.
  • fall in love again and again. ada beza antar loved and in love. please get the difference.
  • create a moment. always find a way to spend time together, two of you ONLY. 

What's next

Always be ambitious and plan your future life.
Always find a precious time to be closed to Allah. it is worth your time than doing other things.
Always call home :) it is a therapy. (for me)
Always aim to be better day by day.

sekian dulu untuk kali ni.

Friday, 21 March 2014

bad examples of 'take it for granted' teachers

today is a good day and a bad day. SPM result for my adik, ashraf has come out today. and yes, i am suprised with his result, he really has done a good job, teachers also suprised by his performance in study. yes, i am happy and he is happy too. but, there is one thing about the result that really 100x pissed me off and spoilt my mood today.i am totally annoyed and really upset. my dad and mum are also upset now. how come the slip show no result for English paper and it has been marked as not attending. why? i really dont get it who on earth has taken this for granted? why? why my adik. it really 100X doest make sense! why? because my adik sat for both English papers and the whole school saw him taking the exam including teachers! all people in the school know my adik because he is oen of well-known student in the school. and english exam has two papers! how come they marked it as not attending. are they trying to say that both of the papers that  my adik has answered were lost from the pile? what ? i am really2 not satisfied! why 100x ?? why my adik????
i am really pissed of because this is not my first time getting upset by this school! earlier this year, i was already pissed of when the cocuriculum mark for my adik is only 5.9 out of 10. hello teacher! you know my adik rite?? the whole school know how active he was rite?? why on earth is the mark is only 5.9 , while others who are just below his level scored more than him. he has represented Perak for many times, been awarded as the best athelit of Perak, representing so many things, travel here and there for the sake of the schoola and state, and you keyed in 5.9 for him?? when i called the teacher, you know what she said? " ooo.. cikgu lupa...kenape dia tak beritahu cikgu awal2"... Allah... dalam hati tuhan je la yang tahu betapa tak pentingnya sorang anak murid tu bila dia dah keluar dari sekolah tuu.. masa dia berjasa dulu, cikgu2 jaga dia, sanggup hadiah dia kasut mahal sebab tak nak bagi dia pindah sekolah... boleh lupe.... hhmmmm... whatever lahhhhh cikgu, you betul, you kan cikgu, so  you sangat2 la mulia!
and there are many more bad stories happened to my adik that i feel like bursting now! i just don want to recall because i am tired with all this! what kind of people they are! #
i am really wanted to know what happened to the English papers! who are the one who are responsible to mark is as not attending, not appreciating that my adik had strived to answer the papers. he wrote many essays at home for the sake of doing the best for his English papers. oh Allah.. i am really2 upset... :(((((
one more bad story today, there was one cikgu, which the story that i heard from my mum has really made me think like "what? is he orang asli? is he really2 ortodok who dont know how to use brain?? " what he did is, one teacher ask him to call my adik becuase my adik got called to represent perak for one event, he did not have my adik's phone number, he tried to find my other brother who is studying there, but he could not find my adik, because my adik was not at school, been training at Ipoh, manjung, here and there, then you know what he did?? he just let the offer go without telling my adik! " imagine!! there are many other teachers in that school who has my adik phone number! even the school record has the contact number of my father!!! whyyy you donno how to use brain? or you maybe has used your brain, but others has lost brain to give you the number???
the point i am writing all this not to 'talk bad without purpose'. i hate what those people did! i hat the deed, not the person! this deeds are so so not supposed to be done by those people. they should be showing that they are a good example to your students.. they really made my adik frustrated many times already. they shouldnt've done this! i dont know their names, because i dont want to know them. i just want to keep in my mind that i am not going to do this to people. this is really a  bad deed.
to teachers out there, please be a good educators, show a good example to all! not only to your students but also to the parenst! i am so so sad to know that my parents are worried now. i am so so sad....  :( please dont do this to other people. if you are a take it for granted person, you please dont be in society, you please live in the jungle. :(((
what now?
my new plan now is to bring out my other adik from that school! (currently in form two in that bloody school).. by hook or by crook, i will 'racun' , pujuk, 'bribe' him to move out from the school, i will do that. i dont want any of my adik2 to be in that school anymore. because i have spotted many attitutes  of 'taking for granted' and 'dont care' about future of students. enough is enough. i will racun everyone at home to ask my adik to get out from the school. the school has shown us many bad attitutes. i dont want by brothers grown up seeing all those. bad environment.
my adik is in sabah now representing Perak. see, all my adik representing Perak. i will wait for him to come back and talk to him about this..

i will fight for this!
i am the eldest kakak to all of them, i know they rely on me! their problem is my problem. look how much the school has spoilt my mood!

i will never let this thing happen to my adikkss again. never!

Thursday, 27 February 2014


Hari ni 27 February, 2 hari lepas birthday adik saya, Abdul Halim Nasir..

umur Halim dah 13 tahun. wahhh cepatnya masa berlalu, kenapa aku rasa aku static ja tapi adik2 aku begitu cepat membesar. my adik is no longer budak2.. he is teenager now. and I used to spend much time with him when he was in primary school. now, when he started to study in borading school, he is the one which i spent time the least. this is so sad. i still remember my last day at home before flying back to uk back in 2012 i guess, he was spending full day with me at home, we did so many activities together. how awkward i feel now when i could only spend few days with him in last year :((

that is why i really wanted to be at Malaysia sometimes because i really wanna be in touch with all of my siblings, and family. i am overly attached to people i loved. i am that kind of person. and here in uk, i am too attached to my husband like budak2 until sometimes i do feel that i am not being independent. and this is not a good thing.

however, this is just about living a life. in term of study, i am able to rely on myself because my husband does not understand what am i doing. he is studying something else at different university. so, i am happy that at least i could rely on myself, not totally on him.

hhmm... back to the story, i am so sad that i have not wished halim his birthday because he is at boarding school now. but, few days ago, i received a good new about him that he is qualified to represent PERAK for marathon at national level in SABAH :) i know that he is very happy because he really wanted to fly! hahaha... i am happy for you halim. kakak is so proud of you. you and abang have been so awesome. sampai sekolah berebut nak enrol both of you.

also recieved a news that halim wanna change school. i know that this gonna be a big headache to the teachers in your current school as you are their hope to represent your school name. but, i am supporting you to change school based on many uncomfortable stories that i heard before! go, change school! they will care about you better!

okay, and lastly, as kakak sulung, i really wanna all my adiks rajin solat, rajin baca quran dan hormat mak abah. thats it.



Sunday, 16 February 2014

Iphone 5S Ashraf :))

Dear bloggy,  Iphone 5s ni milik adik saya, muhammad Ashraf :)) 

Saya happy sebab lepas ni saya boleh facetime dengan family di rumah :)) saya rindu semua orang teruatramanya adik kecik saya, arif :)

saya harap ahsraf happy dapat gadget yang bernilai RM2400.00 ni :))

yang penting, jangan lupa pada Allah, Allah yang maha member rezeki kepada kita. kita sebagai hamba perlu selalu bersyukur dengan kekurangan kita sebab kita nak jadi hamba Allah yang baik.

Tetapi jangan sesekali kita terlibat dengan kerja-kerja zalim seperti yang banyak berlaku di Malaysia. sebagai rakyat, aku dah sampai tahap tak tahan dah dengan betapa zalim nya sistem yang ada di tangan manusia ni. Manusia sesungguhnya sangat rakus dengan duit. manusia yang rakus akan Allah balas di akhirat kelak, kita sebagai rakyat tak perlu tuntut sebab Allah maha Adil, Allah yang akan balas. yakin dengan Allah yang maha adil. sesedih mana pun kita dengan sistem yang meaniaya kita, kita kena ingat kita ada Allah. hari ni aku rasa annoyed sebab aku rasa teraniaya.

tapi, back to the story, harap hanphone yang canggih ni dapat digunakan sepenuhnya. dan jaga baik-baik tau ap! 

What a life - some reflections of annoying things.

what a life.

today, i feel so annoyed with many things/people/systems! i feel annoyed because people are bothering me, systems are "zalim" and things are happening fishily in front of me. 

life is always up and down, and you got to meet so uncountable kinds of people! you better be sabar as sabar is a sword! here are some reflections!

First, one thing that i've learnt the most about it is that "you just dont expect people like the way you thnik" kadang-kadang untuk benda yang jelas mana betul, mana salah, dan you tahu cara you fikir tu betul, then you should be happy, at least you have got knowledge that makes you think that way.

but, in the case where you people are having conflicts of ideas on something, you just quickly reset your brain and say to yourself that those people are not you, they are different human beings, been raised up with totally different background. that's it. 

the second thing that i learnt the most is that please don't think and expect anyone perfect, perfect like "wow, i like to be friend with you, you're always make my life okay/better" ... seriously, no. only Rasulullah is perfect. therefore, when you are in a closed relation with someone, be it friends or relatives, you just bear in mind that everything will not turn as perfect as you wanted it to be. 

The third thing about life is, if there is people A who talk bad about other people B in front of you, you better just stay away from people A. people A is more dangerous than people B, indeed, sometimes. seriously. i am grateful that so far i am surrounded with educated people who seldomly "mengumpat" . Mengumpat without a legal purpose is so so resembles how bad you are in practising Islam. seriously.

have you ever met someone that dislike you by default. from my experience back in SMK, there is one, or two, or three. back then, i was so noob, and totally clueless of why the hell these people dislike me. and you know what, out of those people, all of them are already becoming my friends expect for one. so, i may concluded that, these people dislike me due to some reasons "ada yang cakap sebab aku pandai dari dorang" or what ever reasons la, i dont care, but the point now is the main problem is you guys belum matang lagi masa tu :) so, i forgive you guys :))

but,  the only one who still dislike me. lets flashback a abit, she was my senior at school, one i got into the school with a pure heart for the sake of studying to achieve my ambition, suddenly out of knowhere i smell some kind of jealousy that comes from her! yes, thats the only reason that i can think of! and i just carry on my life and becoming one of the best students. last year, me and my ex schoolmate bumped into her in a shopping complex, shockingly she talked to my friend like i never exist! she did not even look at me. she pretending that i wasnt there. what! then, i came back, i reflect! then recently i decided to email her and say a bit like " i never have anything to do with you but you seems dislike me, i dont care if people dislike me, but i care if i made wrong to people, so if i made wrong to you back in 10 years ago, please forgive me" after writing that, i feel so relief because i am so sure that , i got nothing to do with her, i just know her nama and her face! to be honest, as i grow 24 now, i have learnt so many things about life, and i just dont care about things that not gonna help me to get into syurga Allah.

i tried to do the best things to not troubling people as i dont like people troubling me. whatever i dont like people doing to me, i will totally avoid from doing so. and please people around me, if you ever notice that i have weakness in something, please dont let me jump into the weakness and ruining my other important things in life.

the last thing about life that i wanna write today is : have you ever met people that search for you when they are in need and leave you/ forget you/ dont care about you when there are happy/ no need your help anymore/ have lots of other friends/stable/ ? if you dont have one, you are lucky because people around you appreciated your existence whenever they happy or not happy. but me, i have few. but,  it's okay. those people might not know the importance of jaga hati orang lain. and these people may having friends that only can hang out when they are happy and started to find someone else when they are sad. whatever it is. i dont care so long as i dont do that to people.

the big lesson to me is, your husband is your best friend ever. he is the one who never jealous of your big success, the person who never envy, who always support you, the person who always wanna look you happy, yes, your husband is your true friends! 

Tuesday, 14 January 2014

Setahun berlalu

Setahun dah berlalu, suatu peristiwa yang memberi impak besar dalam kehidupan besar kepada aku dan orang-orang yang aku paling sayang. sedih macam mana pun, harus diingat bahawa Allah ialah tuhan yang maha adil, maha penyayang. setiap kesedihan yang dikurniakan akan disusul dengan seribu hikmah yang Allah telah rancang. Allah takkan biarkan hambaNya bersedih berpanjangan. di sebalik kesedihan tu, Allah nak hambaNya lebih dekat kepadaNya. Alhamdulillah, actually salah satu hikmah yang besar dah dapat dilihat. Alhamdulillah Allah, semoga kesabaran itu membawa ke syurga.

Allah, ringankan beban hambaMu itu..... Engkau tuhan yang maha penyayang..

Lagu yang menenangkan.... nyanyian Opick, Cahaya hati.

Allah engkau dekat penuh kasih sayang
Takkan pernah engkau biarkan hamba-Mu menangis
Karna kemurahan-Mu
Karna kasih sayang-Mu
Hanya bila diri-Mu
Ingin nyatakan cinta
Pada jiwa yang rela dia kekasih-Mu
Kau selalu terjaga yang memberi segala

 Allah Rahman Allah Rahim
Allahu Ya Ghafar Ya Nurul Qolbi
Allah Rohman Allah Rahim
Allahu Ya Ghafar Ya Nurul Qolbi

Di setiap nafas di segala waktu
Semua bersujud memuji memuja asma-Mu
Kau yang selalu terjaga yang memberi segala

Setiap mahluk bergantung pada-Mu
Dan bersujud semesta untuk-Mu
Setiap wajah mendamba cinta-Mu cahaya-Mu

Yaa Allah Ya Rahman
Yaa Allah Yaa Alllah Yaa Allah
Ya Nurul Qolbi
Yaa Allah

terima kasih Allah, ala kulli hal.

Saturday, 11 January 2014

Mengharapkan yang terbaik untuk 2014

Assalamualaikum.. hello again my blog.. it's been long since my last update. too many things to catch up on te few weeks before 2013 ending. currently, i am in my lovely sometimes annoying second home which is IC (main library of my university). to be honest, I am so happy staying in this big warm building all day all week. the idea of reading and typing in my room is crap. because my room is weirdly cold and i cant bear with it. i've tried already and i ended up sleepy and ready passively which is annoying. therefore, everyday i will make my move to IC to do many things. not only study but also youtubing as i wish.

today, i plan not to type my final year project report as im in the mood to do revision for my only one exam. just now, i saw someone who i guess is typing her report. i saw her face was so monyok like my face all day before when i was typing my research. when i doing my research, i always wondering am i doing a  beneficial work. sometimes i think what i type is rubbish. is this research? questioning myself with no returning anwer. therefore, i just entertain myself by thinking that my reseach is important for me to grad as an engineer. i always want to grad wit first class honour. been getting first class for last three years mean that i have to retain the grade to make my effort in the past three years worth it. rite? however, i always want to learn as much as i could in this final year. so that i am not graduating with a blank mind.

to be honest, the feeling of getting ino new year of 2014 is not that exciting. i am happy as 2013 has passed because it is my most horrible year ever, i would say. the year in which i cried the most and it unconsciously changed my personality from sanguine to plagmatic. i hope i always plagmatic since it suits engineer character.huhh. the sad feeling is about leaving sheffield for good this year, with the permission of the Almighty. ahh.. i cant think of the moment when i take a train and flight and leave this lovely country for good. the moment i waited the most before but now, i feel so not happy to leave this country as i fall in love with this country already. but, if i want to stay leaving here, i have to pursue study. and i dont understand why my sponsor doesnt reply my email yet regarding that. i might end up just follow the current. future is so complicated.

i'm hoping a better year this time. i want to cry no more. i pray for the happiness of my beloved brother. i want to see everybody around me happy. and i want everybody around me always remember Allah as thats the only things that we can call as inner peace. inner peace is priceless. i dont care if you less succeed in your study so long as you are an obedient to parents and Allah. as an eldest daughter, i will always try the best to help my siblings, in all aspects the best i could.

hoping to create and appriciate more moment this year,
may Allah ease.
may Allah bless.

salam from Sheffield, UK